Raised by Emotionally Immature Parents?
It’s time to heal, and our therapists can help.
Like it or not, your childhood impacts every aspect of your life. If you were raised by emotionally immature parents, you are probably still struggling with your self-esteem, enjoying fulfilling relationships, and navigating the storms of life. The good news? Healing is possible.
Growing up with emotionally immature parents creates deep patterns that can feel impossible to change. You might find yourself taking care of everyone else while neglecting your own needs, struggling to trust yourself and others, feeling responsible for other people's emotions, doubting your worth, and moving through life with a constant undercurrent of numbness or anxiety.
The truth is: The emotional neglect you experienced wasn't your fault.
You needed emotionally available parents to develop a secure sense of self. When that support wasn’t provided, you did the only thing you could do, survive - often by becoming the parent yourself or by disregarding your own needs and feelings.
Here’s what you need to know: While you can't change your past, you can heal its impact on your present and future. Our holistic approach to therapy helps you reconnect with your authentic self, develop healthy boundaries, break free from people-pleasing patterns, and finally feel at home in your own life.
If you're ready to transform the pain of your past and create the life you long for, we can help. Our therapists understand the unique challenges of healing from emotionally immature parenting and can guide you toward deep, lasting change.
Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents in San Francisco, El Dorado Hills + Online
"Understanding the past is the key to unlocking a different future" - Pema Chödrön
Your Inner World:
Finding it hard to identify what you want or need
Living with a constant sense that something's wrong with you
Doubting your decisions unless others approve
Feeling like you're always waiting for the other shoe to drop
Unrelenting perfectionism
Low self-esteem
Self-sabotaging behaviors
Moving through life feeling emotionally empty or numb
Feeling guilty when you take time for yourself
Struggling to relax and enjoy life
Signs You May Have Been Raised by Emotionally Immature Parents
Your Relationships:
Finding yourself drawn to unavailable or emotionally distant people
Co-dependent patterns and people-pleasing
Saying "yes" when you want to say "no"
Feeling responsible for how others feel
Losing yourself in relationships
Struggling to trust your gut instincts
Walking on eggshells to keep the peace
Finding it hard to let others truly know you
Physical Symptoms:
Chronic tension in your body
Difficulty sleeping or relaxing
Digestive issues
Feeling physically drained and exhausted
Holding your breath without realizing it
Chronic pain or unexplained health issues
Feeling disconnected from your body, your heart, and your intuition
Common Types of Emotionally Immature Parents
The Overwhelmed Parent
Always stressed and emotionally checked out, this parent might be physically present but mentally elsewhere. While they provide basic care, their own overwhelm leaves no space for your emotional needs. You learned early that your feelings were “too much” and developed a people-pleasing, caretaking pattern.
The Externally-Focused Parent
This parent measures worth through others' eyes, making appearances and achievements the currency of love. Their anxiety about "what others think" becomes your responsibility, and you learn that being loved means being perfect. Your authentic self gets buried beneath the pressure to perform.
The Emotionally Volatile Parent
This parent's unpredictable emotions rule the household. One moment might feel safe, the next chaotic, leaving you constantly scanning for emotional storms. You developed a hypervigilant nervous system, always preparing for the next wave or outburst.
The Rejecting Parent
This parent treats emotions like weaknesses to overcome. They might praise "staying strong" while shaming normal feelings and needs. You learned to hide your emotional world, developing a deep sense that your authentic feelings make you somehow flawed or unworthy.
Benefits of Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
When you work with one of our therapists, we can help you:
Learn how to stop people-pleasing
Find relief from codependent relationship patterns
Develop a strong sense of self-worth independent of others' approval
Create and maintain healthy boundaries
Trust your intuition and inner wisdom
Navigate relationships with confidence
Connect deeply with your authentic needs and feelings
Release stored trauma from your nervous system
Transform self-criticism into self-compassion
Build meaningful relationships based on mutual respect
Finally feel at home in your own life
Types of Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
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Depth Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
Uncover and heal unconscious patterns and childhood programming that impact your present life, creating lasting change.
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Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
Understand and transform the protective parts of yourself that developed in response to emotional neglect -
Somatic Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
Release stored trauma and emotions through body-based healing approaches, helping you feel safe and grounded in your body.
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Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
Transform limiting beliefs and patterns stemming from childhood experiences through practical, evidence-based techniques.
Therapy for adult children of emotionally immature parents is designed to heal the root causes of your struggles, not just manage symptoms. We offer an integrative approach that combines traditional talk therapy with somatic healing, nervous system regulation, and depth work to transform childhood patterns that no longer serve you.
Our approach embraces the mind-body-spirit connection, helping you understand how emotional neglect impacts your relationships, self-worth, and ability to trust yourself and others. Through this holistic lens, we guide you to reconnect with your authentic self, develop healthy boundaries, and create new patterns of relating to yourself and others. You'll learn practical tools for emotional regulation while doing the deeper work of healing childhood wounds, so you can finally break free from old patterns and create the life you deserve.
What is Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
Here at The Holistic Counseling Center, we believe that healing from emotionally immature parenting requires a holistic approach that honors the complexity of your experience. Our approach focuses on sustainable, root-cause healing that not only helps you understand your past but transforms its impact on your present and future.
Our licensed therapists offer a holistic therapeutic approach that blends:
Evidence-based therapeutic techniques
Practical tools for emotional regulation
Somatic practices for nervous system healing
Deep inner work for lasting transformation
Our team is dedicated to creating a warm, supportive environment where you can explore, heal, and grow. We offer our services both in-person in San Francisco, El Dorado Hills (near Folsom and Sacramento) and online.
Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents at The Holistic Counseling Center
Hi, I’m Kim Burris
Founder of The Holistic Counseling Center and Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist
You can't change your childhood, but you can transform its impact on your life today. Through therapy, you'll learn to process past pain, reconnect with your authentic self, and finally develop the self-love that may have felt impossible before.
Growing up with emotionally immature parents leaves deep wounds, but healing is possible.
I founded The Holistic Counseling Center because I am passionate about helping people just like you heal the root cause of your struggles, not just manage symptoms. I know how transformative holistic therapy can be, especially when working with childhood wounds and triggering family dynamics.
If you're ready to find relief from the impact of emotional immaturity and create a life you love, schedule a free consultation call to get started. We'd be honored to support you on your healing journey.
Meet Our Team of Therapists
Kim Burris
MA, LMFT, Founder
Anxiety, Postpartum Depression, Shadow Work, Existential Crisis + Conscious Evolution
Dr. Susan Pomeranz
Ph.D, LMFT
Anxiety, Stress/Burnout, Life Transitions, Disordered Eating, Shadow Work + Spirituality
Perri Griffin
MA, LMFT
Anxiety, Shadow Work, Postpartum,
Existential Crisis, Life Purpose + Spirituality
Clara Stewart
MA, LMFT
Anxiety, Relationships, Shadow Work, Complex Trauma, Moms, Teens and Couples.
MA, AMFT
Sinclair Mitchell
Anxiety, Trauma, Shadow Work, Spirituality, Moms, Teens, andCouples.
Tessa Wendell
MA, AMFT
Anxiety, Trauma, Shadow Work, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Moms, Teens and Couples.
Our Offices
We offer in-person therapy from our offices in El Dorado Hills, CA (near Folsom and Sacramento), San Francisco and online counseling in California.
What People are Saying
★★★★★
Clara is one of the most caring and supportive individuals I have met in this field. She brings a calming energy to any environment and has such a genuine and kind heart. Her clients are lucky to have her!
- Lillian, Folsom, CA
Ready to Work Together?
Here’s how to get started:
Additional Resources
Ready For Your Next Life
Changing Book?
Download a list of our favorite books to support your healing journey.
Dive Deeper: Articles for Exploring Healing
FAQ’s about Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents
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Emotionally immature parents often struggle to attune to their children's emotional needs. You might have found yourself being the "mature one," managing your parent's emotions, or feeling unseen and invalidated. While they may have provided for your physical needs, there was likely an emotional emptiness in your relationship that you're still trying to fill.
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Yes, healing is possible whether you choose to maintain contact or create distance. Therapy can help you develop healthy boundaries, process grief, and build new ways of relating - both to yourself and your parents. The goal isn't to change your parents, but to change how their emotional immaturity impacts your life.
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Emotional immaturity exists on a spectrum, and you don't need to have experienced severe trauma to benefit from therapy. If you recognize self-sabotaging patterns that are impacting your life and relationships, therapy can help you heal and create positive change.
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Healing isn't linear, and everyone's journey is unique. While you may experience significant shifts within a few sessions, deep healing often unfolds over time. We work at your pace, honoring your process while providing practical tools you can use right away.
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Look for a licensed mental health professional with specific training in attachment, trauma, and family systems. All of our therapists at The Holistic Counseling Center are licensed to practice psychotherapy and have advanced training in working with childhood trauma and emotional neglect.
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If you're ready to begin your healing journey, reach out to schedule a free consultation call. We'll discuss what's happening in your life, answer your questions, review logistics like fees and schedules, and if it feels like a good fit, schedule your first appointment.
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We offer Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents anywhere we can legally and ethically provide therapy, which varies depending on your location.
If therapy isn’t available in your state, holistic coaching may be an option for support.
If you live in one of the following locations, we can provide online therapy:
California (El Dorado Hills, Sacramento, Folsom, San Francisco, Santa Cruz)
Colorado
Alabama
Arizona
Florida
Missouri
Utah
Idaho
Washington
Pennsylvania
Still have questions? Text us or schedule a free consultation call to find out if we can support you in your location.
Make an Appointment with a Holistic Therapist Near You
Curious about a holistic approach to shadow work and how our therapists can support you? Let’s chat! Just click below to schedule your complimentary consultation call and our intake coordinator will reach out to discuss logistics and schedule your first appointment.
If you have any other questions feel free to send a message through this contact form and we’ll get back to you in the next 48 hours.