The Cycle Ends With You.

Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents.

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Like it or not, your childhood impacts every aspect of your life. If you were raised by emotionally immature parents, you are probably still struggling with your self-esteem, enjoying fulfilling relationships, and navigating the storms of life. The good news? Healing is possible.

Growing up with emotionally immature parents creates deep patterns that can feel impossible to change. You might find yourself taking care of everyone else while neglecting your own needs, struggling to trust yourself and others, feeling responsible for other people's emotions, doubting your worth, and moving through life with a constant undercurrent of numbness or anxiety.

The truth is: The emotional neglect you experienced wasn't your fault.

You needed emotionally available parents to develop a secure sense of self. When that support wasn’t provided, you did the only thing you could do, survive - often by becoming the parent yourself, or by burying your own needs and feelings to get by.

Here’s what you need to know: While you can't change your past, you can heal its impact on your life. Our holistic approach to therapy can help you reconnect with your authentic self, develop healthy boundaries, break free from people-pleasing patterns, and finally feel at home in your own life.

If you're ready to transform past pain and start creating a life you can love, we can help. Our therapists understand the unique challenges of healing from emotionally immature parenting and can guide you toward deep, lasting change.

Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents in California + Online

"Understanding the past is the key to unlocking a different future"
- Pema Chödrön

Signs You May Have Been Raised by Emotionally Immature Parents

Your Inner World:

  • Finding it hard to identify what you want or need

  • Living with a constant sense that something's wrong with you

  • Doubting your decisions unless others approve

  • Feeling like you're always waiting for the other shoe to drop

  • Unrelenting perfectionism

  • Low self-esteem

  • Self-sabotaging behaviors

  • Feeling guilty when you take time for yourself

  • Struggling to relax and enjoy life

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Your Relationships:

  • Finding yourself drawn to unavailable or emotionally distant people

  • Co-dependent patterns and people-pleasing

  • Saying "yes" when you want to say "no"

  • Feeling responsible for how others feel

  • Losing yourself in relationships

  • Struggling to trust your gut instincts

  • Walking on eggshells to keep the peace

  • Finding it hard to let others truly know you

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Physical Symptoms:

  • Chronic tension in your body

  • Difficulty sleeping or relaxing

  • Digestive issues

  • Feeling physically drained and exhausted

  • Holding your breath without realizing it

  • Chronic pain or unexplained health issues

  • Feeling disconnected from your body, your heart, and your intuition

Common Types of Emotionally Immature Parents

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The Overwhelmed Parent

Always stressed and emotionally checked out, this parent might be physically present but mentally elsewhere. While they provide basic care, their own overwhelm leaves no space for your emotional needs. You learned early that your feelings were “too much” and developed a people-pleasing, caretaking pattern.

The Externally-Focused Parent

This parent measures worth through others' eyes, making appearances and achievements the currency of love. Their anxiety about "what others think" becomes your responsibility, and you learn that being loved means being perfect. Your authentic self gets buried beneath the pressure to perform.

The Emotionally Volatile Parent

This parent's unpredictable emotions rule the household. One moment might feel safe, the next you’re caught up in the chaos, leaving you constantly scanning for emotional storms. You developed a hyper-vigilant nervous system, always preparing for the next wave or outburst.

The Rejecting Parent

This parent treats emotions like weaknesses to overcome. They might praise "staying strong" while shaming normal feelings and needs. You learned to hide your emotional world, developing a deep sense that your authentic feelings make you somehow flawed or unworthy.

Benefits of Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents

When you work with one of our therapists, we can help you:

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  • Learn how to stop people-pleasing

  • Find relief from codependent relationship patterns

  • Develop a strong sense of self-worth independent of others' approval

  • Create and maintain healthy boundaries

  • Trust your intuition and inner wisdom

  • Navigate relationships with confidence

  • Connect deeply with your authentic needs and feelings

  • Release stored trauma from your nervous system

  • Transform self-criticism into self-compassion

  • Build meaningful relationships based on mutual respect

  • Finally feel at home in your body and in your life

Types of Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents

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    Depth Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents

    Uncover and heal unconscious patterns and childhood programming that impact your present life, creating lasting change.

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    Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents


    Understand and transform the protective parts of yourself that developed in response to emotional neglect

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    Somatic Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents

    Release stored trauma and emotions with body-based healing approaches, helping you feel safe and grounded in your body.

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    Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents


    Transform limiting beliefs and patterns stemming from childhood experiences with practical, evidence-based techniques.

Therapy for adult children of emotionally immature parents is designed to help heal the root causes of your struggles, not just manage symptoms. We offer an integrative approach that combines traditional talk therapy with somatic healing, nervous system regulation, and depth work to transform childhood patterns that no longer serve you

Our approach embraces the mind-body-spirit connection, helping you understand how emotional neglect impacts your relationships, self-worth, and ability to trust yourself and others. Through this holistic lens, we guide you to reconnect with your authentic self, develop healthy boundaries, and create new patterns of relating to yourself and others. You'll learn practical tools for emotional regulation while doing the deeper work of healing childhood wounds, so you can finally break free from old patterns and create the life you deserve.

What is Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents?

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Here at The Holistic Counseling Center, we believe that healing from emotionally immature parenting requires a holistic approach that honors the complexity of your experience. Our approach focuses on sustainable, root-cause healing that not only helps you understand your past but transforms its impact on your present and future self.

Our licensed therapists offer holistic psychotherapy that blends:

  • Evidence-based therapeutic techniques

  • Practical tools for emotional regulation

  • Somatic practices for nervous system healing

  • Deep inner work for lasting transformation

Our team is dedicated to creating a warm, supportive environment where you can explore, heal, and grow. We offer our services both in-person in San Francisco, El Dorado Hills (near Folsom and Sacramento) and online.

Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents at The Holistic Counseling Center

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Hi, I’m Kim Burris

Founder of The Holistic Counseling Center and Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist

You can't change your childhood, but you can transform its impact on your life today. Through therapy, you'll learn to process past pain, reconnect with your authentic self, and finally develop the self-love that may have felt impossible before.

Growing up with emotionally immature parents leaves deep wounds, but healing is possible.

I founded The Holistic Counseling Center because I am passionate about helping people just like you heal the root cause of your struggles, not just manage symptoms. I know how transformative holistic therapy can be, especially when working with childhood wounds and triggering family dynamics.

If you're ready to find relief from the impact of emotional immaturity and create a life you love, schedule a free consultation call to get started. We'd be honored to support you on your healing journey.

Therapists for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents

Meet The Team

Kim Burris

Founder, Licensed therapist, LMFT

Anxiety, Inner Child Work, Shadow Work, Existential Crisis + Conscious Evolution

Dr. Anjali Connors

Holistic Psychologist, PsyD

Anxiety, Trauma, Life Transitions, Psychedelic Integration + Spirituality

Perri Griffin

Licensed Therapist, LMFT

Anxiety, Neglect, Emotionally Intelligence, Shadow Work, Postpartum, Existential Crisis + Spirituality

Assocaite Therapist, AMFT

Sinclair Mitchell

Anxiety, Trauma, Shadow Work, Inner Child Healing, Spirituality, Moms, Teens, and Couples

Tessa Wendell

Associate Therapist, AMFT

Anxiety, Trauma, Shadow Work, Relationships, Self-Esteem, Moms, Teens and Couples

Our Offices

We offer in-person therapy from our offices in El Dorado Hills, CA (near Folsom and Sacramento), San Francisco and online counseling in California.

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What People are Saying

★★★★★ 

“Dr. Connors has been a positive force in helping me navigate through some hard and trying times.”

- Client in Folsom, CA

Ready to Work Together?

Here’s how to get started:

Additional Resources


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FAQ’s about Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents

  • Emotionally immature parents often struggle to attune to their children's emotional needs. You might have found yourself being the "mature one," managing your parent's emotions, or feeling unseen and invalidated. While they may have provided for your physical needs, there was likely an emotional emptiness in your relationship that you're still trying to fill.

  • Yes, healing is possible whether you choose to maintain contact or create distance. Therapy can help you develop healthy boundaries, process grief, and build new ways of relating - both to yourself and your parents. The goal isn't to change your parents, but to change how their emotional immaturity impacts your life.

  • Emotional immaturity exists on a spectrum, and you don't need to have experienced severe trauma to benefit from therapy. If you recognize self-sabotaging patterns that are impacting your life and relationships, therapy can help you heal and create positive change.

  • Healing isn't linear, and everyone's journey is unique. While you may experience significant shifts within a few sessions, deep healing often unfolds over time. We work at your pace, honoring your process while providing practical tools you can use right away.

  • Look for a licensed mental health professional with specific training in attachment, trauma, and family systems. All of our therapists at The Holistic Counseling Center are licensed to practice psychotherapy and have advanced training in working with childhood trauma and emotional neglect.

  • If you're ready to begin your healing journey, reach out to schedule a free consultation call. We'll discuss what's happening in your life, answer your questions, review logistics like fees and schedules, and if it feels like a good fit, schedule your first appointment.

  • We offer Therapy for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents anywhere we can legally and ethically provide therapy, which varies depending on your location. 

    If therapy isn’t available in your state, holistic coaching may be an option for support.

    If you live in one of the following locations, we can provide online therapy:

    Still have questions? Text us or schedule a free consultation call to find out if we can support you in your location.

Make an Appointment with a Holistic Therapist Near You

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Curious about how we can help you heal from the impact of being raised by emotionally immature parents? Let’s chat! Just click below to schedule your complimentary consultation call and our intake coordinator will reach out to discuss logistics and schedule your first appointment.

If you have any other questions feel free to send a message through this contact form and we’ll get back to you in the next 48 hours.